While there have been subtle and not so subtle shifts in my life. And while I am more comfortable in my own skin, the truth is…
There are some days when I don’t work out
I still watch Days of Our Lives…just now on hulu
Sometimes dinner is the jar of almond butter with a spoon
I will leave clothes in the dryer and just pull them out as needed…for days (ok, weeks)
I’ll leave dishes in the sink overnight or all day
While I try to be present in each moment, I do think about the past and wonder ‘what if?’
Even though I enjoy my solitude, some nights I’d like to come home to someone who I can cuddle with on the couch, who is not my cat
Somedays its not ‘all good’
I know that I can’t fix things for you but dammit I really really wish I could
I’m not sure what my passion is and I’m really trying to figure that out
I spend more money than I make and sometimes it stresses me out but I don’t normally let on that it does
Sometimes I curl up on the couch and watch tv for hours
And somedays, I don’t leave my house, don’t talk to anyone, don’t even get out of my pjs.
The truth is…life is not all sunshine and roses…sometimes its weeds and rain. But I believe that it is all exactly as it is supposed to be…the good, the bad, the ugly. The truth is…I don’t think I’d change any bit of it.