Lost

reflection looking out

I’ve been trying to figure out how to put into words what I’ve been feeling lately.

  • stuck
  • in limbo
  • stagnant
  • floundering
  • immobile

I’m in this space where I’m not sure what do to next, where to go, what’s coming or going.  I’m a bit LOST.  I don’t know another way to explain it and I’m sure its not going to be clear here.  Since starting this post earlier this morning, I’ve had a conversation with a dear friend who explained it perfectly…you’re in transition.  As soon as she said it all made sense.  I made big huge changes recently, moved to a new home, quit my full time job, ended and restarted a relationship and now…I’m in this space with little motivation, little direction and little energy.  I get up every day and am out of the house early, off to the pilates studio or to the office for a short time so its not like I’m curled in a ball under the covers.  Although most afternoons when I get home, I do tend to take a nap instead of cleaning or doing laundry.  

I doubt this will make sense but I feel like I’m in-between lives.  The one I left is long gone but the one that’s coming, I don’t know how or when I’m going to get there.  I don’t know if there is anything I can do to get there faster.  Nothing seems to get me that excited lately.  I want to have fun but am not sure I know how to or what would constitute fun right now.

Boy I sound like a real barrel of laughs and I’m rambling and none of this is probably making any sense.  I’m not looking for sympathy or answers to these questions.  I’m just sharing here where I am, the good, the bad and the ugly.  Maybe some of you are feeling the same, well I know at least one friend is because she helped me put a name to it.

I guess I really don’t have to figure it all out and try to be ok with where I am, in this state of Transition.  But if there’s something to help speed it up, I’ll do it because really this place….not so much fun.

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9 Responses to Lost

  1. Bella says:

    🙂 I think it’s just difficult because transition never feels comfortable. Love to you.

  2. elizabeth says:

    Seriously– where is the e-course for leaving TRANSITION in the fucking dust? sign me up!

    xoxox, E

  3. Confusion is the hallmark of a transition. To rebuild both your inner and outer world is a major project.
    Anne Grant

    and that e-course? maybe we should create one??? LOL

  4. Barb says:

    It never ceases to amaze me that even though we are several hundred miles apart, our feelings are always so similar

  5. simplytrece says:

    It sounds like you are becoming your butterfly self, and the unfurling and drying of your wings cannot be rushed. You are right where you are supposed to be, in exactly the condition you need to be in. It will all work out in the end, I am sure. You are resilient and a survivor. A winner!!

  6. tschitschi says:

    I know the feeling!

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